Friday, March 25, 2011

Technology @ Play


22 players. 4 umpires. And a computer. Is that why cricket has become full of glitches?

AD: Hey, no mails from you for a long time... no Facebook updates, no Twitter messages...

BC: Ever since the World Cup began, I haven't managed to go near the computer. The only screen that I've been staring at is that of my TV.

AD: Well, you can probably do without a computer, but cricket can’t.

BC: Computers in cricket? Now I know why the game has frequent stoppages, its future ‘hangs’ in balance, newer versions are constantly being tried out and everyone’s claiming that the game’s gone corrupt.

AD: Oh c’mon! Technology adds a lot more clarity and insight to the game.

BC: Really?

AD: The UDRS (Umpire Decision Review System) ensures that the on-field umpires don’t make mistakes…

BC: …except in lbw decisions when the impact of the ball on the pads is over 2.5 metres from the stumps.

AD: Well, the ICC has amended that rule now. What about Hotspot? That’s hi-tech stuff used by the military - it creates bright spots when there is friction produced by the collision of two objects. So it’s easy to spot an edge when the bat comes in contact with the ball.

BC: What use is technology that can’t be made available everywhere? This World Cup is being played without Hotspot as the team behind it wasn’t willing to provide the infra-red cameras.

AD: If you can’t see the edges, you can hear them with the Snickometer. It has a microphone connected to an oscilloscope and if there’s noise of ball brushing the bat, it’s displayed graphically…

BC: It’s not just edges that you can hear… Kids at home are being exposed to terrible language and desperate sledging by the players because of the microphone. At this rate, we’ll soon need a new technology to beep out their swearing.

AD: What about Hawkeye then? It’s a computer system that traces a ball's trajectory and predicts if it would have hit the stumps.

BC: Does Hawkeye take into account factors like the deteriorating nature of the pitch, wear and tear of the ball or weather conditions? Any of these can alter a ball’s trajectory.

AD: Talking of weather, Duckworth Lewis is a big help in achieving a result in rain-affected matches…

BC: You should ask South Africa that. In the 1992 World Cup, they needed to score 22 runs off one ball, thanks to the rule. Duckworth Lewis has still not been understood by most and is like a bad formula in school that everyone learns by heart without understanding it.

AD: What about ProBatter, a virtual reality tool that simulates the deliveries of any bowler in the world? Apparently it played a key role in England winning the Ashes.

BC: Really? If that were so, they should have won the subsequent one-day series too. Any particular reasons why they didn’t practice with ProBatter then?

AD: Are you trying to tell me that technology is no good in cricket?

BC: Well, when was the last time someone had an average of 99.94 or took 19 wickets in a test because of a computer?

AD: But the viewing pleasure…

BC: After having waded through the worm, the manhattan, the beehive, stump vision, wagon wheels, pitch maps, rail cam and spider graphs, you realise that cricket was once a simple game…

AD: Obviously technology and you don’t go together.

BC: But my life has a lot in common with cricket. Technology has successfully managed to complicate both.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Mothered by a computer


Imagine if computers became human – and one had to develop a relationship with them!

BC: What’s with these computers? It’s always a virus or files gone corrupt or the machine slowing down…

AD: You’ve got to treat them with love.

BC: Well, I’m already turning them on…

AD: You should treat them like family. Develop a bond with them.

BC: Really?

AD: Treat them like they’re humans – we have a lot in common with them! Computers belong to families too. Like the IBM ES/9000 family, the HP Series 80 family and so on.

BC: Do they leave behind…

AD: …a legacy? Sure they do, except that in their case, it might be old technology, unwanted files, etc.

BC: Such grief for future generations…

AD: That’s another common aspect - like us, computers have generations too. There have been five computer generations thus far.

BC: That’s saying a lot…

AD: Here’s another common aspect – computers need to be booted up for them to start work, much like most human beings.

BC: Nothing inspires like a kick on the backside, huh?

AD: Absolutely. And in moments of a crisis, both computers and human beings freeze.

BC: Considering the fact that some humans have more silicon in them than computers, it’s going to get difficult to differentiate between the two.

AD: CAPTCHA (Completely Automated Public Turing test to tell Computers and Humans Apart) takes care of that. Remember those letters that you key in when you register on a website? That’s to ensure that the response is not generated by a computer.

BC: And what kind of a relationship does one maintain with a computer?

AD: Well, there’s enough kinship in the IT world. How about a strict Pop who sets the rules at home, like POP (Post Office Protocol) an internet standard protocol for e-mails? For a milder version of a father, you could choose DAD (Desktop Application Toolbar) from Perfect Office, a floating toolbar to which you can add applications.

BC: No thanks, I wouldn’t want to be fathered by technology…

AD: If you’re looking for maternal love, you could go for MOM (Microsoft Office Manager), the MS Office button bar and the precursor to the shortcut bar. Of course, the mother of all computer technology is the MOTHERboard.

BC: You’re going to make me cry now.

AD: How about some avuncular overtures then? The Unix Net for Computer Security in Law Enforcement is called UNCLE.

BC: No thanks!

AD: Care for some sibling rivalry? Brothersoft.com is one of the Internet’s top three most popular software download sites. An abbreviated form, .BRO is an extension used by various design applications.

BC: Are you suggesting a lost-and-found formula?

AD: Ok then, if you’re looking for a sister, SIS (Software Installation Script) is an archive for Symbian OS.

BC: Have you left anything out?

AD: Yup, a son! That was how EPSON was born – the SON of EP (Electronic Printer).

BC: At this rate, you’ll have little kids running around. Who’ll take care of them?

AD: A disciplinarian nanny, of course! A net NANNY is a software brand that allows you to filter internet content.

BC: I think I’ll just stick to being with humans.

AD: Well, don’t blame the computers if they treat you like unwanted application files that have been left behind on the hard disk.

BC: Unwanted files?

AD: Yup, they’re called ORPHANS.